1. |
All This Time I am Alone
03:29
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I finished the bottle by
4 AM
Even though I said it was disgusting
But thats not what my face said
When I put it on the nightstand
I’m failing with shortness of breath
Images of you flashing through my fucking head
And investing
Through my bedding
Constantly swaying
My stance on you and
Never not considering a portrait of you as
An overwhelming
Sigh of relief
Your eyes talked more than you ever will again
I’d die if I could, but fuck it I miss my friends
And trying to pretend
All these feelings are dead
In a wishful regret
Like that other time before
And I’m really not sure
(Yet)
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2. |
Pop Tart
02:55
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Cut your losses
Admit defeat, and tweet about it later
You’d like to think
As you self inflict your anger
That you’re better
You’d like to think
That everything could be
A girl and a cold drink
As this feeling repeats
Hey whats up
You look great
Me? Oh I’ve just been hanging out, and doing my own thing, oh and
By the way, I've been thinking about the days when we’d hang out all the time
Drink cheap bear, then get sicker
Take a cig break, this feelings so bitter
I wish I could forget
All these times you made me remember
I pass the time
Like I hope nobody else does
Letting faint connections fade
Waiting on the time of day to change
Missing feelings and stupid shit you used to say
I’m down to my last Pop Tart
And I’m still waiting on hearing the truth from you someday
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3. |
Goin' Hamms
03:32
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|
Have I
Been smoking
Too much
To be wanting
To be walking
To going back to your street
Back to
Drinking black coffee
I feel something approaching
A sense of self loathing as I
Think of how you used to be
Im tired of seeing you
Living so peacefully
Away from
Any sort of planned out reality
You send me
Pictures of your smile
I waste away
Live my life, Die
And wish I could go back in time
Remember all the things we used to do
When I was sick you brought me soup
What do I even have to lose, I screw my fist into my face and almost lose a tooth
I can’t speak my mind when all you want to hear is, all you want to hear all the time
How am I supposed to try, to try and live my life without ever thinking of what you’re doing right now
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4. |
Waiting
03:42
|
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|
I haven’t been
This confused since I took that math class
And I’m pretty sure I passed that
But now I’m completely collapsing
I close my eyes but nothing happens
All the bones in my legs are snapping
I wanna pick you up to talk and
Try to find a resolve
Peace I’ll never find that
I’ll never get you back and
I know it’s all my fault
My mouth and my eyelids can’t seem to stay open
To tell you I’ve been thinking ever since I left you thrown around and
I want you back in half in doses
Or however you’re tryna do it
I’ve never worried about directions
And I’ve always felt impatient
Entirely encapsulated
I had never felt more rejected
I sit on my bed in the dark
And cry all over my mattress
Relying on seeing you for sustenance
Your pretty smile and my restless torment
It’s better than Hell
Or at least that’s what I tell myself
Obtaining reassurance
From certain words that you may or may not have really meant
In the end
I’ll take whatever I can get
My mouth and my eyelids can’t seem to stay open
To tell you I’ve been thinking ever since I left you thrown around and
I want you back in half in doses
Or however you’re tryna do it
I’ve never worried about directions
And I’ve always felt impatient
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5. |
Cliche Love Song
02:56
|
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|
Lately I’ve been waking up feeling like I haven’t slept in days. The thought of what you last said to me has me thinking of the next day. Alone, in my head, feeling lost confused and let down. Wish I knew why, when lately I’ve been feeling actually happy.
You don’t even know who you are anymore. So cold and distant, I smoke all this weed to end my feelings but when I’m with you it’s like I never ever really needed to
I can’t think, of anything, to say but clichés, I know that its probably good for me to start new, open up, let you in, i know that its hard but I’ll take a chance again. You miss me, don’t worry, I’m fine and of course I, still love you, as always, you are always on my mind
And I’m not afraid to cry, when I’m with you I actually feel alive
And I don’t want you to feel like a piece of shit, because I know that I have that affect
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6. |
Didn't You Think I?
02:16
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It's been 18 years of me trying to learn to be a little more friendly, and it's not like I don't give a fuck turn your cheek and press repeat.
Oh you're so immersive and you're winding down with your ties unbound and, you write it off as a joke while you'll be caught up in what I just wrote.
It's late alright nothing's new, except when I said "fuck off" to you, all I had quit were my temper fits, and all your annoying arrogance
I trusted you way too much, didn't you think I would have cared if you, never showed up.
Late tonight somethings new, all I can feel is the color blue, to me you meant everything but now you're gone and I don't give a shit.
I'm tired, of my feelings being pushed around let down
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